There Really Is No ‘War on Christmas’

Did you know there’s a war on Christmas? Indeed, I’ve heard conservative talk radio hosts complaining about it twice this week on KFAB. Sheesh, where’s Tom Becka when we need him?

“The war on Christmas” is what some Christians call it when more fair-minded people do things like maintain separation of church and state or choose to say “happy holidays” rather than “merry Christmas.” It seems these people believe that all kids should have a Christmas program and party at school, and everyone should say “merry Christmas.”

You, too, you crazy Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, pagans and other non-Christian religions. Who cares what holidays you celebrate; it’s all about Christmas, dammit. Oh, and we atheists are going to burn in hell, but maybe we can save our souls just a little by shouting “merry Christmas” through the streets.

“Why do they want to pretend it’s not Christmas?” has been a common sentiment from hosts and callers alike on the shows I’ve heard. Why? Because for billions of other people on Earth, it’s not Christmas; it’s Yule, Hanukkah, or another holiday, maybe one not even celebrated in December, that’s why. I’ve listened to dozens of Christians complain that they feel their religious beliefs are being attacked every time someone says “happy holidays” instead of “merry Christmas,” and that they want their kids to be able to celebrate Christmas in school.

Well, the latter is easy: Send your fucking kid to a Christian school. They’ll celebrate plenty of Christmas there. But don’t expect it in the public schools. What are the Jewish or Muslim or Buddhist or atheist kids supposed to do while your brat is celebrating Christmas? In addition, I have to wonder how those Christians would feel if their kids celebrated Christmas in school but also celebrated Hanukkah, Ramadan, Winter Solstice and other non-Christian religious holidays.

Christians actually feel attacked because someone says “happy holidays” or because their kid’s class has a holiday party rather than a Christmas party? From what I’ve seen, it’s usually Christians doing the attacking, and their insistence that Christmas is king only proves my point.

Watch the War on Christmas PSA

Christians can be a pushy lot: They go out and actively recruit new members, often visiting other countries, telling people that their beliefs are wrong because Christianity is the only “right” path. Some Christians go door to door trying to convert others to their way of thinking. The fact is a specific group of Christians just aren’t content with their own personal beliefs; they want everyone else to also share those beliefs.

Yet certain Christians are the first to complain about everyone else not sharing their beliefs.

In a past life, when I waited tables, I started saying “happy holidays” to my customers for three reasons: First, I’d had enough of Christianity in general. Second, I felt like automatically saying “merry Christmas” to my customers might make some people feel like I was closed-minded and only knew about Christmas. I didn’t want people of other religions to think that I didn’t accept them and their beliefs. Third, “happy holidays” encompasses whatever winter holiday you celebrate, as well as New Year’s, and you can even stretch it to include Thanksgiving.

“Happy holidays” stuck for me, and for the most part it has worked well — although I’ve certainly encountered my share of crusty Christians who squint their eyes and look down their noses at me as they respond, “Merry Christmas!” as though they have now put me in my place.

Here’s an idea: Let’s all be open-minded and not assume that everyone shares our personal beliefs. Let’s respect everyone’s personal beliefs, no matter how much we might think they’re wrong and we’re right. And let’s not accuse the people who want to do this of waging war on Christmas.

In a day or two, I’ll blog about the atheist who loves Christmas (me).