31 December 2007

No Religious Zealots for President, Please

Every time I hear Republican candidate Mike Huckabee’s name, I recall the scene in the movie I (heart) Huckabees when Naomi Watts’s character leans over and says very pronouncedly in the executive’s ear, “Fuckabees.” Every single time.

And that, dear readers, is reason enough not to vote for Mike Huckabee. We just can’t have a President Fuckabee.

Oh, alright, there are other reasons not to vote for him, too — like his anti-gay, anti-abortion, pro-Christian stances. We don’t need a president bringing God into the government and lawmaking.

But for me, the second biggest reason not to vote for Huckabee (besides the President Fuckabee thing) is that he has openly stated that he does not believe in evolution and is a creationist. This country should not be run by some fool who discounts the scientific evidence of evolution in favor of his superstitious beliefs. And don’t even get me started on Mitt Romney.

Carbon dating and a myriad of information and evidence prove that the earth is far older than 2,000 years that creationists believe and 6,000 years that intelligent design devotees believe combined. Plenty of evidence also exists to support evolution. Anyone who disregards science in favor of religious superstition not only should be slapped but should also be openly forbidden from running for a government office.

I’ve gone on this rant before, and apparently it’s time again because Huckabee isn’t the only conservative candidate who does not believe in evolution; Tom Tancredo and Sam Brownback have also admitted to believing that evolution is bunk. They don’t really have a chance of winning the Republican nomination, but the fact that Huckabee is a frontrunner is disturbing. Even more disturbing is that roughly half of all Americans say they don’t believe in evolution, either.

Has this country really come to this? Are people actually choosing their Christian beliefs over logic and scientific proof? Or is it just that people are so haughty that they can’t stomach the thought that their ancient ancestors were apes?

Look, folks, religion came about way back in the early days of humans to explain the unexplainable. For example, the Greeks didn’t understand why the sun rose and set, so they attributed the phenomenon to Apollo pulling the sun with his chariot. (He also was blamed for plague outbreaks.) In Egyptian mythology, Ammun was the creator god and created everything. The Vikings didn’t understand strife or wildfire, so they attributed such events to the mischief of the trickster god, Loki.

In fact, pagan pantheons are quite similar. The gods had different names in each pantheon, but their functions were much the same. Even some of today’s religions are polytheistic, such as Hinduism. And Buddhism, although not truly polytheistic, does have higher beings, or gods, called Devas.

The Christians, in my opinion, were unimaginative and lazy. Why take the time to create stories about all these different gods and goddesses? Let’s just say there’s one god and he does it all.

But now we know why the sun rises and sets. We understand the cause of and need for events such as wildfires. We understand why and how certain weather conditions occur, and we know that people, not vengeful gods, start wars and spread disease. Science has explained these things. And as science progresses, religion, at least as an explanation for why and how, becomes unnecessary and illogical.

Christians are happy to dismiss the Greek, Egyptian and Norse gods as silly folklore, but they cling so tightly to their own god and insist their religion is truth and the Bible is fact — “God” really did create the earth in seven days and created woman from Adam’s rib — despite scientific proof otherwise. If you’re going to go with that thinking, then let’s just say, “Screw science. Apollo rides that chariot across the sky every day and that’s why the sun rises and sets.”

Does that sound naïve and stupid? Well, so do creationism and intelligent design.

Have your religion to make you feel good, to feel like you’re not alone, to use as an outlet for grief, rough times and wishes. But don’t try to claim that religion reigns superior to science and logic. And please don’t let irrational religious zealots run this country.

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